Thursday, September 30, 2010

lib fun time

In short, were Jesus to to return in the flesh, he would be executed again, not by the world but by the church. Or left by the church to die in the cold, like Sheldon's character, or to be shot down in the nightmare urban violence of America's urban warfare because Christian's support right-wing extremists opposed to gun control, or excluded as an illegal immigrant.
John Caputo, What Would Jesus Deconstruct, p 32

Oh, joy, a favorite fun exercise of the left, "What outrageous and ridiculous things can we accuse the church of today!". Caputo's version seems to be "How the church would mistreat Jesus!"

Can I play, too?

Were Jesus to return in the flesh today...

The liberal media would write nasty things about Him, because He wasn't an evolutionist, but rather talked about Adam and Noah as if they had been real people.

Oh, and He would be pro-Israel, even as He would say some hard things about them.

Progressive churches would deny him a place in their pulpits, because He would insist on taking biblical moral teachings seriously, and spoke strongly against their attempts to say all religions lead to God. He would insist that only belief in Himself was the way to God.

Emergents would not invite Him to their conferences, because He would tell them that attempts to rethink and reimagine Christianity are misleading and wrong.

Muslims wouldn't like Him, because He'd tell them that Mohammed was wrong.

He'd tick off the Buddhists and Hindus and Mormons, too.

The political liberals (and no doubt the materialistic religious liberals) would be less than happy with Him, because He'd tell them to not love the world, He'd speak about His Father as if He is a real being and some kind of nonperson that runs around in men's minds. Plus, He'd work miracles, which would make those liberals scurry to explain them away.

Mostly, they'd get ticked off because He just wouldn't stand with them on things like global warming, robbing the rich to give to the deadbeats, homosexual rights, the right to abortion, anti-globalism, anti-imperialism, anti-this and that. He would not follow Alinsky's rules for radicals, wouldn't join in protests against police, wouldn't come down on the side of illegal immigrants.

Oh, no doubt, he would have some things to say to conservatives, too, and not all would be complimentary. He'd probably warn them about compromise with those of similar political ideas but seriously different religious beliefs. He'd probably tell conservative Christians to stop trying to appear nice to the world. He'd likely say that there's too little difference between the progressive who blatantly abuse and mishandle His Word, and evangelicals who water it down and make the Gospel the ultimate self-help method and God a perveyor of good feelins. And I'd hate to think what He'd say to the Word of Faith crowd. He'd probably say some things about speaking the right things but not living by them.

Which side would attempt to kill Him? Oh, certainly those of other religions have killed many Christians, so there's that to consider. I think progressives and emergents would, like the Jewish religious leaders of old, be so disappointed with the real Jesus over the one they've tried to imagine and deconstruct that, in order to preserve those imagined and deconstructed Jesus', they'd have to do away with the real one.

And I think there would be conservative Judas' who would be more than willing to sell Him out.

No comments: